BLOG/MENTAL HEALTH | depression awards

[image description: several illustrated "depression award badges", reading "washed the dishes", "managed to eat breakfast", "painted my nails", "read a page of a book", "did not oversleep", "folded my clothes", "did the laundry", "replied to an email"]
[image description: several illustrated “depression award badges”, reading “washed the dishes”, “managed to eat breakfast”, “painted my nails”, “read a page of a book”, “did not oversleep”, “folded my clothes”, “did the laundry”, “replied to an email”]

back in spring, i somehow came to the conclusion that doing my semester exam, moving out of my dorm, moving to Berlin and starting my internship all within a matter of two weeks is absolutely manageable. nothing to worry about!

turned out it wasn’t. the last weeks of May and pretty much the whole June were the worst days of my life, in terms of how i felt at least. it was a very turbulent time which, obviously, wasn’t the best for my (non-existent) mental stability. my depression intensified so much simple everyday tasks were the biggest struggle for me. the only thing i wanted to do was sleeping; and i did, around 12 hours a day, only to feel tired again a couple of hours after waking up.

during those times, executing the simplest tasks felt like a victory. cooking lunch, washing the dishes, taking a shower, replying to my boss’ email – all that was an honourable act.
that’s why, on one of the better days, i drew these little awards/badges; to reward myself for the hard work. and trust me, that was hard too.

if you feel the same now, remember, it will eventually get at least a bit better. you’re a great, wonderful and strong human being and you can live through this, even though it’s difficult. ♥

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